Tuesday, July 6, 2010

I have my cake...why can't I eat it too???

Well, time to face the ugly (or should I say HEAVY) truth and come clean to myself and to all of you.

FACT: I have gained 7 lbs in the past week and a half. 7!!! SEVEN!!! S-E-V-E-N! As in 1-2-3-4-5---6----7!!! What the heck?!?!? Giant chocolate cakes from Cosco weigh 7 lbs. Textbooks weigh 7 lbs. BABIES weigh 7 lbs. How in tarnation did I gain that much weight so fast. Let's examine the MYTHS and FACTS of my life recently. And then find a way to make sure this NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN!

MYTH #1: My metabolism/body chemistry has completely changed in the past 6 months, allowing me to eat whatever I want and not gain weight.

You would think that the success that I have had with weight loss would motivate me to never eat unhealthy food again. Ha. Hahahahaha! Are you kidding?!?!? I still crave junk food ALL THE TIME! I mean, seriously! I do love lots of healthy food, but doesn't everyone know that ranch dressing make just about EVERYTHING better?!?!? And who doesn't love them some chips, especially Ruffles Cheddar and Sour Cream. And y'all know that the best thing that ever happened to me was moving to Texas and discovering Blue Bell Ice Cream! Who is with me???

TRUTH: My body chemistry/metabolism has not changed all THAT drastically. If I want to continue to lose weight (YES!!!), or even maintain where I am at, then I will ALWAYS have to measure my portions and count calories. And I don't know why that seems to bother me so much. I guess I am still a little bit in denial about everything. I just keep thinking that one of these days I am going to wake up and be able to eat whatever I want and not gain weight. And that is NEVER, EVER going to happen. So I really need to let that ship sail, DEAL with what I've got, and stop whining about it! Buck up, girl!

MYTH #2: It's okay to take the elevator when I'm really tired or it's hot outside.

I am working at a summer camp, and our labs are on the 3rd floor of a building (up 3 flights of stairs because the ground floor is really the basement). And my dorm is up another flight of stairs, on the 4th floor. I find myself taking the elevator several times a day, because I am hot (hellooooo, this is Texas in July, people), it's sickeningly humid outside, and frankly, the last thing I want to do is trudge up those 3 flights of stairs.

TRUTH: I am not handicapped. I am not in a wheelchair. I have two working legs, and I need to use them. It doesn't matter if I have to walk slowly (the campers usually fly on by me) or even if I have to rest for a few seconds on one of the landings. There is no excuse for taking the elevator (except when I have a bunch of camp supplies that I have to take to the lab or when I am moving my stuff out). So, that's it. No more elevator for me. The truth is I can actually walk up the stairs faster than the elevator can take me, since it's so old and slow. That should be a no-brainer!

MYTH #3: It's okay to eat college cafeteria food, as long as I don't eat too much.

As part of my job as a summer camp director, I get free food and lodging on a college campus. Now, I am always trying to save money, so this is a great set-up. Of course, I am still paying rent on my apartment, but being at camp means I can keep my AC as cold as I want it and not worry about the bill. And I get breakfast, lunch and dinner at the dining hall Monday-Friday. So this is the perfect time to save money on food, right?

TRUTH: It's called the "Freshman Fifteen" for a REASON! Seriously! I didn't live in the dorms in college, so this is a new experience for me. First, it's ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT. There is usually a hot meal, like today's lunch choice: chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes and gravy, corn (guarantee it's been cooked in tons of butter) or green beans with bacon. Or I could eat pizza, or a burger and fries. Or salad--iceburg lettuce mix, black olives, baby corn, cherry tomatoes, carrots, and either Ranch or Italian dressing (no low-fat or fat-free options). Then there's the cookies and banana bread, cake, soda fountain, and my personal favorite, the ice cream freezer--huge vats of Blue Bell Ice Cream-cookies n cream, vanilla, mint chocolate chip, chocolate, butter crunch, or rainbow sherbet. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO RESIST THIS??? Well, I have come to the conclusion that I CAN'T resist it. So, the only other choice is to stop eating in the cafeteria. I brought my little refrigerator that I usually keep in my classroom. I also brought my blender with me. So, for the rest of camp (2 1/2 weeks) I am NOT going to eat in the cafeteria. At all. I am going to make protein shakes (hence the blender) or have yogurt for breakfast, make sandwiches and string cheese and fruit for lunch, and find other things for dinner. Because I simply cannot eat healthy if I go to the cafeteria. The unhealthy options are just too tempting. And the last 3 weeks have proven that I CANNOT resist those temptations. The only meal that I actually have to eat there is lunch, because that's when we're with the campers. But starting tomorrow, I am going to "bring my lunch," just like some of the campers do. Problem SOLVED!

One other comment about the all-you-can-eat thing. I find it very interesting that when I am home, and I carefully measure out my smaller portions, as long as I have a meal that is well balances with veggies, protein, and a small amount of carbs/starch, then I feel full and satisfied when I am done eating. And yet here, when I can have as much as I want, I find myself eating WAY MORE food. I think so much of it is a mental thing. Just knowing I CAN have more seems to make me unsatisfied unless I EAT MORE!!! That's just ridiculous! Avoid all-you-can-eat places at all costs!!!

MYTH #4: You can become a runner (and prepare for a 1/2 marathon in November) by simply visualizing yourself running. This is usually best accomplished while eating some of the Blue Bell Ice Cream mentioned above.

The last month I have been really off my schedule. I was on vacation in Arizona for a week, but I did manage to get in a 1-hour workout at the Y, and also a Zuma class, so it wasn't too bad. I've been at camp for the last 3 weeks and I have worked out all of 3 times. WHAT IS THAT ABOUT!?!?! The crazy part is that there is a really nice trail thing in the back of the campus where I like to run/walk. And yet I've only taken time to exercise 3 times.

TRUTH: I could barely run a mile tonight. ONE MILE?!?!?!? I was up to 4 miles, and now I'm down to just one, and I have to be honest, it was almost more of a "walk with a bounce" than it was a "jog." It was PATHETIC, that's what it was. I am going to be starting hard-core 1/2 marathon training in about a month, and I have GOT to get back on track with running or I will never make it through the marathon. And I LIKE RUNNING! I know that some people hate it, and I can understand how hard it is to make yourself do something you hate. But I actually LIKE to run. I do. So I have GOT to start MAKING time to run 3 days/week again. Visualizing isn't enough. I have to get out and DO IT! Even when it's hot, or raining, or I'm tired, or I have work to do, or any other excuse I come up with. As Nike counsels us, JUST DO IT!

MYTH #5: It's okay to consume tons of candy and gallons of caffeinated drinks when you are stressed out. After all, you are STRESSED, and you DESERVE to take comfort in food when everything around you is falling apart.

These past few weeks have been totally stressful. I have had a lot of challenges with running camp, and pretty much all of them have been things completely out of my control. Whether it was problems with our websites being blocked by the university web filter, or a random power line falling on a perfectly clear and windless day and knocking out power for the entire university (it was actually a nice break to sleep in a hotel instead of the dorms for a night), there have been LOTS of CHALLENGES for me, and I have been feeling very overwhelmed. So, to combat the fatigue and stress, I have been eating candy and drinking soda like it's going out of style. Hence the 7 LBS GAINED!

TRUTH: Life is always going to be stressful. If you make excuses for "letting yourself go," then pretty soon you'll be using any old excuse to justify your bad habit. The truth is, I would probably have dealt with all the stress much better if I had exercised instead of looking to food for comfort. And I have to face the fact that whether it's working at summer camp, teaching, dealing with family issues, dating, disagreeing with friends, etc, there is ALWAYS going to be stress of some kind in life. That is just reality. So, since I know it's always going to be there, I need to find a HEALTHY way to deal with it. Like exercising, or reading a book, or going for a drive. Not consuming 3/4 of a bag of peanut butter M&M's (and I'm NOT talking about the little individual sized bag--I'm talking about an 18 OZ Bag!!!). Now, that's not to say that I can't have a treat now and then. But I cannot abandon all reason and pig out (see MYTH #1). I need to eat carefully controlled and measured treats, not entire bags of chocolate.


Well, I feel better after getting all of that out (and I DID work out tonight--partly because I freaked out when I saw the scale, partly because I felt guilty for not working out for so long, and partly in an attempt to negate the fact that I had ice cream today with BOTH LUNCH AND DINNER!!!). Tomorrow is a new day. Things have gotten a little out of control these past few weeks, but I can't dwell on that too much. After all, I've got an extra 7 lbs to lose, so I BETTER GET CRACKING!

Rather than debate whether or not I can have my cake and eat it too, I think I'll take a page out of Sampson's book. When I see temptation, I'm going to lace up my Aasics and literally START RUNNING! :-)